well well, okok. so i got my Priest advancement, and that is the most important thing really so I'm really happy. Its real hard work to prepare for it. But I'm glad I'm finally there. (:

so for the rest of the list...To be with her...blehh, why did I even start to think about that...Really, how great a chance do I have really. Laughable. Really pathetic. I'm right aren't I? But somehow, no matter how much I try to deny, how often i bluff myself, I know the truth. I'll fight for her till the very end. I just cant help it. WIll I do whatever it takes? Yes. Yes I will. Everything I have. Until I 1) Run out of energy 2) Get slapped by her. hahaha! So will someone get her to do that please. lol. I'm joking. haha. I'll fight. I will. Heck the rumours. I don't care about rumours. Not me. But I don't know about you and thats what scares me. But right now, I won't back down. Thats not me. Is this the right choice I'm making? Only time will tell I guess...Unless you will tell me...

So life is hard. You try your best, but sometimes, you get under-appreciated. But you live with it. You try your best, but others don't see it. You push all emotions down. Plaster that fake smile on your face, and pretend that nothing is wrong. You be the role that others need you to be. The punching bag etc. Pretend that nothing is wrong. Yes, you're a very good actor. But why can't you push down your feelings that you have for her like you manage to push down other emotions (okay I must not delve into that topic anymore today). So again, you plaster a smile on your face. Pretend nothing is wrong! Better to hurt yourself then others you say. Man, you're too nice for your own good. But you still do it. And if you can cheer someone else up with your false optimism? Thats fulfilling. And thats what the Uncle TRIES to do...But how long will he last before he falls...

Don't tell me. I don't want to knoww...
so drown yourself in words of poetry...the next piece is halfway done...